Forgive and Forget
by CJS-DEPPendent
Summary: Sara has been acting strange and Grissom doesn't know why. When Sara's moods become too much, Grissom meets up with an old friend and makes a huge mistake. Will Grissom and Sara ever be ok again? GSR, WIP, hints of CW. Please Read and Review. Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

_**Disclaimer:**__ To my great regret, I don't own CSI, the Characters or any of the songs mentioned in the story._

_**A/N:**__ Just something I though of one night. Doesn't really fit into any time frame of the series. Hope you enjoy it and __**please review.**_ Thanks ;) Enjoy.

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Forgive and Forget

It had become a custom now for dinner to be silent. They sat at opposite ends of the table and utter nothing but a polite 'pass the peas' for 45 minutes.

Then the silence was broken.

"I'm going to bed" Sara spoke calmly but yet distantly.

Grissom merely nodded as he poured himself a scotch. Once she was gone, he sighed. _What on earth is going on here?_

He looked back on the past month and couldn't quite figure out where things had gone wrong. All of a sudden, without any apparent reason, Sara had become very cold. They barely spoke, kissing seemed to be out of the question and at work she avoided him. He couldn't think of anything he'd done wrong, yet he felt he was the one who needed to apologise. _What is going through that woman's mind?_ He thought as he poured himself another glass of scotch and turned on the TV.

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"Morning guys!" Came Catherine's voice as Grissom and Sara entered the building. Sara merely nodded and walked into the locker room. Grissom sighed and returned the greeting.

"Morning Catherine. What's up?"

Catherine watched the locker room door close and looked back at Grissom "What did you do?"

Grissom raised and eyebrow and looked at her innocently "Absolutely nothing. She's been acting like that for a month!"

"And you think you didn't do anything?! Women are a mystery to men, Gil. I get that. But when a woman acts like that, there's no mystery. You must have done something to piss her off."

Grissom simply shrugged and decided to forget about this problem until he got home again "Anyway, what do we have?"

"B&E in Henderson, simple enough, I'll send Greg and Nick. But this one requires our special attention. Give you a hint…Sandbox, Stilettos, Insulin and 20 grand a week."

She watched as Grissom put the dots together and sighed "What happened this time?"

She handed him the slip and he read it "Another murder?" Shaking his head, he walked into his office to drop off his things and came back seconds later holding his kit.

"Warrick!" Catherine shouted across the hall "How'd you like to get off paper work for today?"

Warrick smiled broadly making Catherine go weak in the knees and joined them ready to get out of the office.

"Just missing Sara…unless" She looked at Grissom wondering if he'd want Sara on this particular case.

"Lets go." Sara approached them holding her kit and smiling, though not once did she look at Grissom.

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"Never thought I'd be here again…" Said Warrick looking up at the large mansion.

"At least not on work hours" Joked Catherine as she walked to the door and knocked.

Less than five seconds later, a woman they all knew too well opened the door and stood in the door way.

"Welcome, again." She spoke in her usual, calm, sensual tone and Catherine noticed Grissom's attempt to look anywhere but at Heather and Sara "The body's in the pool house."

She pointed to the building in front of the house and proceeded to escort them over.

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"I found her this morning. I was showing some clients around and she was just there." She pointed at the body held up by chains on her ankles and wrists.

"So…" Came Catherine's voice as she noticed the obvious whip marks "…submissive or dominant?"

"Neither. She's not on staff." Said Lady Heather and all heads turned her way. That was a turn they hadn't expected. "I'll leave you to your work. Miss Willows, Grissom" She nodded at each in turn and exited the room.

Grissom sighed of relief once she was gone and seemed to become himself again as put on some gloves and started looking around.

"This doesn't look like the murder scene" He said looking at the body and then at the surroundings.

"You think she was killed somewhere else?" Catherine asked looking at some fresh wounds on the body.

"Most probably." Sighed Grissom putting on his gloves.

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Later that day, back at the lab, Grissom stood in the hallway talking to Sara about the evidence.

"Silk?" He asked as she handed him the report.

"Yes, Gil. Silk." As usual, her tone was polite yet distant and she seemed impatient.

"Sara, what's wrong?" He asked holding her arm and pulling her into his office for privacy.

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"Gil. … Grissom!" She used his last name on purpose.

"Sara, just tell me what's wrong." She turned away from him "Oh for god's sake! Just say it!"

"This isn't working, Grissom. You and Me." He looked blankly at her as she opened the door and began to exit.

"Sara…" The name came out in no more then a whisper and she was gone.

Unable to believe what had just happened, Grissom let himself fall onto his couch, his face in his hands trying to think of anything, any tiny detail he may have over looked that would tell him _why_ this was happening.

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_**Thanks for reading, on to the next chapter….**_

_**Please don't forget to review.**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Disclaimer:**__ To my great regret, I don't own CSI, the Characters or any of the songs mentioned in the story. I do however own all the mistakes._

_**A/N:**__ Just something I though of one night. Doesn't really fit into any time frame of the series. Hope you enjoy it and __**please review.**_ Thanks ;) Enjoy.

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Sitting in the break room, Catherine heard Sara's voice shout 'Grissom' moments before the door opened and she stormed out. Curiosity took over and she walked over to the furious brunette.

"What's wrong, Sara?" Catherine asked in a protective, motherly tone.

"Nothing, can't you all just leave me alone?" Sara tried to walk away.

"No, we can't. Sara, I worry about you. I just want to know everything is alright." Catherine held her wrist in her hand to prevent her from going "was it something Gil did?"´

Sara just stared at the floor "It's many things…it's too complicated and I don't want to talk about it. Ok?" Her tone was strong and determined and Catherine decided not to press her anymore…for now

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When he got home, he found the house in full darkness. There wasn't a sound.

He hadn't even been sure if he should go home. Then again, this was as much his home as it was Sara's and he wasn't going to give up without knowing there was nothing he could do to fix things.

The next morning, Sara walked into the living room to find Grissom lying on the couch. His glasses in one hand, a book on his chest. Normally, she would have found herself aching to lie on top of him. But today, she didn't. _At least now I know why_ she though as she moved to get something to drink.

It had all happened so fast. She didn't know how to handle things. She knew he loved her and, god, she knew she loved him. But this was all too much. She figured he'd run from it, so it was better to let him go now than be hurt later.

After breakfast, she left for work and figured she shouldn't bother waking him.

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Grissom walked into the break room rubbing his neck. Sara knew how bad it was for him to sleep on the couch and she'd left him. It hurt, but now was not the time or place to deal with it.

"Catherine, hit me…" He said pouring himself some coffee and waiting for Catherine to tell him the assignments.

"Well, since you were late, Greg and Nick are already on their way to another B&E in Henderson and Warrick is already on his way to Heather's with Sara. We'll join them as soon as you're ready."

"Fine…let's go." He put down the cup of coffee and headed for the door. Catherine sighed noticing his bad mood and followed.

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When they finally got to the scene, they were met by Warrick and Sara. Neither Sara nor Grissom looked at each other and though the tension was obvious, Warrick and Catherine seemed to have an unspoken agreement not to ask questions.

"So…Warrick, Sara you process the pool house, we'll process the perimeter and main house." Catherine looked from Sara to Grissom as she nodded and walked off back to the pool house without a word or look his way. Once Sara was gone, Grissom too started walking away.

"Gil…wait up!" Shouted Catherine as she ran up to her supervisor.

"What?" He asked bitterly.

"Look, whatever is going on between you two, keep it at home. We don't need your attitude here and _I_ certainly don't need it." She sounded slightly angry but at the same time concerned.

"Sorry. I'll start inside, you take the perimeter, come and find me when you're done." He spoke in a monotone voice obviously trying to hide his annoyance.

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A while later, Grissom had finished the entire upper floor except for the largest bedroom. Judging by the fine décor and clothes in the closet, he figured it was Lady Heather's and took extra care in handling things.

"Expecting to find something?" Came a sensual voice from the door way.

Grissom turned to see Lady Heather leaning against it, arms folded against her body. Though he knew it was wrong, he could help feeling attracted to her. _Hey, at least _she_ speaks to me_ he thought. "Will I?" He asked raising an eyebrow. Smiling, she walked in to the room and closed the door.

"You might find something…" She kept walking closer to him, her gaze never leaving his face.

In his mind, Grissom was panicking. Sara had told him it was over. He was hurting. There was a gorgeous dominatrix standing in front of him. Ethically he shouldn't do it. Logically, there was nothing stopping him.

Before he knew it, her hand was on his face and she was standing mere inches from him.

"You can say stop." She whispered as he placed a hand on her hip.

"If I wanted to, I would have…" Now he brought his hand to her face and passed his thumb along her jaw-line. He passed a finger over her lips and she gasped.

From that point on, it was all a bit of a blur to Grissom. He remembered the kisses, he recalled removing her clothes and her removing his. He even remembered making love to her. But what he remembered most was the lack of _something_. He couldn't call what had just happened 'making love'. There was no love. The only woman he loved was outside and he was lying in bed with someone else.

If earlier he hadn't known what to apologise for. He did now.

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"Where've you been?" Asked Catherine as Grissom walked down the stairs to the foyer.

"I was processing the bedrooms" He tried not to look at Heather as he said it; he'd processed more than the bedroom.

"Well…did you do the entire top floor?" Catherine asked.

"Yea….I just have to finish the bed room." I'll meet you guys outside when I'm done.

Catherine nodded and walked outside to join Sara and Warrick. Lady Heather followed Grissom upstairs.

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"I'll be done here in a minute." He said as he heard Heather approach him.

"Take your time. I'll be down stairs, Gil." She smiled and walked away.

Grissom hung his head as he crouched over his field kit. _Shit!_ Was all he could think before proceeding to analyze the room.

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"Hey, Cath…" Catherine heard Sara call as she waited by the car.

"Yea?"

"You seen Grissom?"

"He's processing Heather's room. Why?"

"Well, Doc Robbins just called, he found some more silk fibres in the vic's lungs. I looked for the source in the pool house, no luck. I'm thinking murder weapon." Sara explained.

"Check the main house. I'll wait"

Sara nodded and walked up the driveway to the large mansion.

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"Miss. Sidle, can I help you?" Asked Heather's voice when Sara entered the living room where she was sitting.

"Um…actually, yes. Do you know where our victim might have gotten red silk fibres from? There weren't any in the pool house." She looked around the room.

"I have red silk sheets on my bed, I can't think of anywhere else. You're more than welcome to examine them."

Sara nodded and headed upstairs.

On the way up the stairs, she walked by Grissom. She didn't look at him, but what she found strange was that he didn't look at her either.

Once the sheets were bagged and all the evidence collected, Sara joined the other three CSI's by the cars to head back to the lab.

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The drive to the lab was silent.

Catherine kept her eyes out the window for the most part, occasionally glancing at the tall, sexy CSI beside her.

Warrick kept his eyes on the road, he too occasionally chancing a look at the beautiful blond sitting next to him.

Grissom hadn't and didn't once look at Sara. He couldn't bare to look at her and see the inexplicable anger in her eyes, imagining what she would do if she found out what he'd done.

Sara too kept to herself. She was relieved that she had so much evidence to process; she wouldn't have to go home until he was already asleep.

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"Greg!" The young CSI turned at the sound of his name to see his favourite brunette walking towards him.

"Yep?" he asked as she approached

She handed him some swabs "I need you to run DNA comparison on these." He took the swabs and walked into the lab. Sara followed.

"What case?" He asked sitting down at his desk.

"Murder at the dominion."

"Ooooh…Sounds like a great book title." He joked as he cleared away some files.

"Anyway, I figure, if the victim was asphyxiated with one of Heather's sheets, and the coroner says she had sex shortly before dying, then we've found our crime scene. Also, I'm betting the killer left behind some DNA." She smiled and pointed at the swabs.

As Greg got to work, Sara left for the locker room; it was the one place she could be away from Grissom.

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Greg had just walked back into his lab to check on some reports when his computer started bleeping indicating he'd found a match to the swabs Sara had given him.

Looking at the computer, Greg saw several matches to the many semen stains and only two female matches. Though the two women were no surprise, one man was.

"What the hell?" He asked himself as he checked through all the reports to find a mistake; there was none.

Shocked, he stared at the screen wondering what to do next.

"Hey, Greg?" Came a voice from the doorway causing him to look up.

"Yea? Oh, Sara, hi." He tried to smile.

"You have my results?" She walked over to him and he switched off the monitor. She stopped in her tracks and looked at him questioningly.

"Greg…what are…" He cut her off by grabbing her arm and taking her into the empty break room.

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_**Thanks for reading, **__** on to chapter 3….**_

_**Please review**__**...I know you want to…**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**Disclaimer:**__ To my great regret, I don't own CSI, the Characters or any of the songs mentioned in the story. I do however own all the mistakes._

_**A/N:**__ Just something I though of one night. Doesn't really fit into any time frame of the series. Hope you enjoy it and __**please review.**_ Thanks ;) Enjoy.

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Technically, Greg knew he wasn't supposed to know of Grissom and Sara's relationship. But he also knew that they couldn't have expected to keep it secret for very long working with people trained to uncover secrets and pick up on all details.

_How do I tell her?_ he asked himself as she sat down on a chair looking at him inquisitively. _She has to know. I can't believe Grissom would do this._

"Sara…" He looked at her and felt the anger towards Grissom burn his insides.

"Greg…I have to get back to work…" She made to stand up and he stood right in front of her.

"Sara…I'm sorry." He handed her the report "I analysed, and double checked the results. There's your vic and many other men…but there's also…"

She cut him off, a tear falling down her cheek "Grissom…" The name came out in no more than a whisper.

Greg tried to pull her into a hug but she simply pushed him away and ran into the locker room. She emerged seconds later with her bag, bumping into Catherine and leaving without another word.

"What bit her?" Asked Catherine as she walked into the break room.

"Grissom." Said Greg between gritted teeth, fists forming at his sides "He cheated on her."

Catherine's head sprang and she stared at him "What?!"

"I ran DNA samples on all the swabs Sara got from Lady Heather's bed. Grissom's DNA was there."

"Oh, Greg. Everyone knows Grissom and Heather have a history."

"This isn't _history_, Cath. The semen stain with Grissom's DNA was the freshest." He looked angrier then Catherine had ever seen him.

"Oh…how's Sara?"

"How do you think she is?! That…" He didn't finish, he simply stormed out of the break room and towards Grissom's office.

"Greg! Where are…" Catherine realised where the young CSI was going to do and started running after him.

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"You son of a bitch" were the words that made Grissom look up from his book.

"Excuse me?" He looked blankly at Greg who was now standing over his desk looking ready to pound him.

"How could you do it? How could you hurt her? She waited for you so long. I…" He raised his fist to punch the supervisor but was held back by Catherine.

"Greg!" She pulled him back and kicked him out of the room locking the door behind him.

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"Wow, Greggo…what's going on?" Asked Nick as he and Warrick walked by.

"Grissom." Was all Greg could say, anger still clouding his judgment.

"What about him?" Asked Warrick as he and Nick stood next to the fuming CSI.

"He cheated on Sara. With Lady Heather."

"What?!" Was all both men could say before joining Nick in staring at the door, anger bubbling in all their systems.

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"You care to explain this?" Asked Catherine as she shoved the DNA report in front of Grissom.

"Oh…" Was all he could say before sitting back in his chair, passing a hand across his face.

"'oh'?! what the hell is that supposed to mean, Grissom? You know what, I can't believe you! I should have let Greg beat you senseless." She sat down angrily in the chair opposite his desk.

"You probably should have…I was an idiot!" He spoke calmly removing his glasses "I…Sara said…she said it wasn't working. Us. I slept on the couch. I wasn't thinking straight, and Heather was there." He took a deep breath and looked at the ceiling.

"She said you were over?" Catherine asked, her voice calming down.

"Not in those words, but her attitude over the past month said as much." He looked at Catherine "I honestly don't know what to do."

"Well…there isn't much you _can_ do. You can't take back your actions. She's hurting right now, but you have to talk to her. Find out why she's been so distant this month, ask her for forgiveness and hope she accepts. This isn't you Gil. You don't do these things."

He merely sighed "You think it's safe for me to go…or is Greg still standing outside?"

She smiled weakly and got up, opened the door and walked out.

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"So?" Was all any of the three very angry men said.

"Lay back guys. Let 'em work this out." Catherine motioned with her hands for them to walk away and a few seconds later, reluctantly, they did.

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Opening the door to his house, Grissom noticed the complete darkness that had settled. However, unlike the day before, the house wasn't in silence.

With a knot in his stomach and his heart tightening in his chest, Grissom approached the bedroom.

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Lying on the bed, Sara clasped the pillow and wept. She sobbed for hours. She blamed herself for all this. _Damn! Why was I so stupid?!_ She didn't think Grissom would have cheated if it wasn't for her. She'd told him it wasn't going to work. She'd pushed him away. He'd done what he thought she wanted, he'd moved on. _But it isn't what I want!_ She clasped the pillow tighter letting her tears soak the soft white fabric _I need him here, especially now. He's not like my father. He'd be great. But he's Grissom. He hates change. I had to push him away. It would be worse if this happened later. _She couldn't handle all the feelings. She'd pushed him away, she knew there was a big change coming and knowing Grissom, she knew he couldn't handle change. It had taken him more then six years to admit his feelings for her; he wouldn't be able to adjust to _this_ in such a short space of time as six months.

"Sara?" Came a voice from the door way.

Without looking up, she said "Go away"

Standing in the door way, Grissom regretted his actions more than he'd ever regretted anything.

"Sara…please…" Grissom was pleading now.

_No._ she thought _it was my fault, but if he was capable of moving on so quickly, then I don't want him back. He didn't even fight for me, for us. _

"Go away, Grissom!" She looked up now and registered the hurt on his face "Get out!"

She threw the pillow at him but it merely fell to the floor a few feet from the bed. He moved towards her and bent over to place a hand on her back.

"Don't touch me!" She rolled away from him.

She wanted him with her, she wanted to feel his touch. But those hands had touched Heather. Those lips had touched Heather. There was nothing she could do to forget it. He'd replaced her mere hours after their conversation. She couldn't look at him.

"I mean it! Get out!"

This time Grissom knew she was serious. He stood up and looking back one last time, walked out the door and out the house.

Alone again, Sara started succumbed to her misery once more. There was no stopping the cascade of tears.

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Sitting in her car, Catherine watched as Grissom exited the building, got in his car and drove off. She wasn't sure if what she was going to do was the best idea, but she had to talk to Sara. She'd seen those two fall in love over the years and wasn't going to let this tare them apart.

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Hearing the door bell, Sara groaned into the pillow and walked over whipping her tears. _If it's Grissom, I'm not opening _she thought as she approached the door.

"Oh…Cath, come in." She said opening the door and trying to hide her tears.

"Sara…" Catherine's voice was sympathetic and she pulled Sara into a hug before she could say anything else "Tell me what's wrong"

Sara tried to hold back the tears but couldn't. "I just…I thought…he took so long to admit he loved me, Cath. He's still really private, I got scared. I'm pregnant and I didn't want my family to end up like my parents. I didn't want to hate him. I didn't…"

"Wow, wow, wow." Interrupted Catherine holding Sara with her hands on her shoulders examining her face. "You're pregnant?"

Sara merely nodded.

"Why didn't you tell him? He has no idea. Is that why you got scared?"

Sara nodded "I wasn't sure he'd want this."

"Oh, Sara. Gil is a lot of things, he's secretive, private, but he loves you. He loves you so much he was going to let Greg beat him over what he did. I think he'd beat himself if he could. Sara, he made a mistake, he loves you and he was confused. Forgive him, if not for you, then for your baby."

Sara tried to smile faintly "I want to Catherine. I really do. But he slept with her; he slept with her when I was mere yards away. He didn't care, he saw me get the sheets and didn't try to stop me. I can't handle him. I did push him away but he didn't fight to come back."

Catherine nodded "Fine. What are you going to do though?"

Sara sighed and walked over to the couch. "Can you get me a leave of absence? I'm not going to ask him for it because he'll ask too many questions and frankly, I don't want to talk to him."

"Sure…how long?" Catherine sat down next to her.

"I don't know, six months? After that, I'll have maternity leave and I think it will be long enough to get my head straight."

Catherine nodded "Alright. But don't wait six months to talk to him."

Sara smiled weakly but nodded.

"Can I get you anything?" Catherine asked looking around.

"No, thanks Cath. You've already been enough help."

Catherine nodded and walked to the door "You don't have to come in tomorrow, if you don't want to. I'll see you and call me if you need _anything_."

Sara smiled and Catherine left.

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The next day at the lab was awquard. Grissom didn't take on any case and simply stayed in his office; whenever he came out, he was target of cold glares from his co-workers. Catherine decided to keep her distance, but by the end of shift, she couldn't hold on any longer. She had to talk to him.

"Grissom?" She asked opening the door slightly.

"Catherine, come in." He sounded distant.

"Are you really just going to stay here, locked up and not fight for her?" Catherine asked sitting down opposite him.

"What's the point? She told me it wasn't working, then she pushed me away and now she doesn't want me back. She even took a leave of absence for six months" he held up the letter on his desk "she doesn't want to see me."

"Well…Gil, I suggest you do something. You waited so long to have her…don't let it go. Grissom, believe me, if you don't tell her how you feel now, you'll regret it later."

"I'll regret it? I already regret it."

"Believe me, Gil. You'll regret it more later."

He sighed "What can I do?"

"Well, I don't know, write her a letter, write her name in the sky, anything you can. You don't want her to go anymore than she wants to leave you. Just show her you're willing to fight."

Grissom merely nodded and to indicate he wanted to be alone, picked up his book.

Catherine sighed and walked out. _Will he do it?_ She thought, hoping Grissom would at least fight for the family he didn't know he had.

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That night, in his stingy hotel room, Grissom took Catherine's advice. _It won't change things, but it might help._ He sealed the envelope and set out to deliver it. He wasn't going to wait for the post to deliver it; it could be too late when they did. He would drive over there and place it in her mail box.

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_**Thanks for reading, **__** Chapter 4 **_

_**Please**__**, please, please, please, please review.**_

_**(yes, I'm begging)**_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Disclaimer:**__ To my great regret, I don't own CSI, the Characters or any of the songs mentioned in the story. I do however own all the mistakes._

_**A/N:**__ Just something I though of one night. Doesn't really fit into any time frame of the series. Hope you enjoy it and __**please review.**_ Thanks ;) Enjoy.

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Hearing a noise outside, Sara looked out the window to see Grissom's car driving off. _What was he doing? _She asked opening the door to see if he'd left anything.

Once she'd registered that there was nothing on the floor by the door, she picked up the mail and walked back inside. _He was probably just driving by._ She thought as she searched through the mail. She flicked through each letter thinking _I'll open it later_ until she reached one that she knew didn't contain a bill. It was written in his had writing.

_Dear Sara, _

_Though I know my apologies are worthless after the pain I've caused you, I must say that I am sorry. There is no justification for my actions. Though I was confused about our relationship and your attitude towards me these past weeks, I should have acted differently. For all it's worth, you should know Heather and I are nothing but friends. You are the only one I ever loved and ever will love. _

_I understand that you want some time away form me and I will respect that. But please, Sara, I love you and need you and I will do whatever it takes to retrieve your trust and earn your forgiveness._

_I expect this won't come as a surprise to you, but as usual, I have chosen others' words to express my feelings. _

_So, since words and actions aren't enough, I hope these songs will be._

_I have enclosed in this envelope a CD with two songs I hope you listen to. They both convey my feelings perfectly and hopefully will let you know just how sorry I am and how lost I fee without you._

_Please forgive me, Sara._

_Love,_

_Gil._

Sara read the letter twice, tears streaming down her cheeks. Then, looking back in the envelope, she removed the CD and placed it in the stereo.

The first song was 'Let's Hang On' by the four seasons.

Lying down on the couch, she listened to the lyrics and couldn't help smiling; he was trying.

_There ain't no good in our goodbye-in'  
True love takes a lot of tryin'  
Oh, I'm cryin'_

Let's hang on to what we got  
Don't let go girl, we got a lot  
Got a lot of love between us  
Hang on, hang on, hang on  
To what we got

You say you're gonna go and call it quits  
Gonna chuck it all and break our love to bits  
(Breakin' up) I wish you never said it  
(Breakin' up) No, no, we'll both regret it  
That little chip 'o diamond on your hand  
Ain't a fortune, baby, but you know it stands  
(For your love) A love to try and bind us  
(Such a love) We just can't leave behind us  
Baby (don't you go) Baby (oh no no)  
Baby (think it over and stay)

_Let's hang on to what we got  
Don't let go girl, we got a lot  
Got a lot of love between us  
Hang on, hang on, hang on  
To what we got   
_

_There isn't anything I wouldn't do  
I'd go to any price to get in good with you  
(Patch it up) Give me a second turn  
(Patch it up) Don't cool off while I'm burnin'  
You got me cryin', dyin' at your door  
Don't shut me out, open your arms for  
(Open up) Your arms I need to hold  
(Open up) Your heart, oh girl, I told you  
Baby (don't you go) Baby (oh no no)  
Baby (think it over and stay) _

_Let's hang on to what we got  
Don't let go girl, we got a lot  
Got a lot of love between us  
Hang on, hang on, hang on  
To what we got_

When the song was finished, she could picture Grissom lying in some hotel room, and it made her heart wither. He was _really_ trying.

The second song was 'Can't get used to losing you' by The English Beat and it too made tears flow down Sara's face.

_Guess there's no use in hangin' 'round  
Guess I'll get dressed and do the town  
I'll find a crowded avenue  
Though it will be empty without you_

I can't get used to losing you  
No matter what I try to do  
Gonna _live my whole life through  
Loving you_

Called up some girl I used to know  
After I heard her say, "Hello."  
Couldn't think of anything to say  
Since you're gone it happens every day

I can't get used to losing you  
No matter what I try to do  
Gonna live my whole life through  
Loving you

Can't get used to losing you  
No matter what I try to do  
Gonna live my whole life through  
Loving you

I'll find somebody wait and see  
Who am I kidding, only me  
Cuz no one else could take your place  
Guess that I am just a hopeless case

I can't get used to losing you  
No matter what I try to do  
Gonna live my whole life through  
Loving you

Can't get used to losing you  
No matter what I try to do  
Gonna live my whole life through  
Loving you

Smiling, she turned off the stereo, _I forgive you_ she thought. However, what she thought and what she was ready to let him know were two very different things.

Picking up a sheet of paper, she began to write a letter to him. She didn't want him to be as depressed as the men in the songs, but she wasn't ready to welcome him back. She needed time.

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"Dr. Grissom" Grissom turned at the receptionist's voice "This was just delivered for you."

"Thanks, Pat." Grissom took the letter and recognizing Sara's writing took it into his office.

_Dear Gil,_

_Thank you for your letter. As much as you hurt me, I don't want those songs to mirror your feelings. It will take time for me to have enough trust in you to fully forgive you. But I understand that I was the one to push you away and I'm sorry for that. _

_Please don't look for me, I'm in Vegas and I'll be back to work in some months. I just need time to think and be away from you. _

_Sara._

He read the letter over several times and then crushed it in his hand. _It doesn't even say 'love Sara'. _He kicked the couch as he stood up just as Catherine entered the room.

"Um…Gil…" She looked at him tentatively.

"What?" He shot out a little too aggressively.

"We have the killer in custody, Warrick's interrogating…but Heather's here and she asked for you."

He gave her a frustrated look but followed her.

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"Grissom." Heather smiled and nodded at him.

Grissom motioned for them to go into a more private room as Greg and Nick passed by looking angrily from one to the other.

"You're upset" Was the first thing she said once inside.

"I…"

"Grissom, you know I can read you better than anyone. You're upset."

"Look, Heather. Yesterday, I…we can't…I can't…" He wasn't sure how to say it couldn't happen again.

"Look, Gil. If what happened yesterday had been about love, it wouldn't have happened like that. I understand that you might not want it to happen again but I hope it doesn't damage our friendship. That would be a great shame."

Grissom sighed of relief; she was saying all the things he wanted to.

"Anyway, I just came by to thank you for solving the case, hopefully it will be the last time we meet under these circumstances, but not the last time we see each other. Take care."

She leaned forward and kissed his cheek before turning back and opening the door. Before exiting, she turned back "I hope you work it out with her."

Grissom barely had time to smile and nod before she was gone.

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_**Thanks for reading. Next up**__**….Chapter 5.**_

_**Please review**__** … please?**_


	5. Chapter 5

_**Disclaimer:**__ To my great regret, I don't own CSI, the Characters or any of the songs mentioned in the story. I do however own all the mistakes._

_**A/N:**__ Just something I though of one night. Doesn't really fit into any time frame of the series. _

_Hope you enjoy it and __**please review.**_ Thanks ;) Enjoy.

_This is the last chapter.__ I guess it's the 'happiest' chapter…_

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Six months past, but to Grissom it seemed like an eternity. As the day of Sara's return rolled closer, he began to feel nervous. He hadn't heard from or seen her since the letter exchange and was scared she'd have gotten over him.

Sara too had a hard time being away from Grissom for so long. However, she had someone else to care for. Almost nine months pregnant, she had to worry about her child and getting things ready for it and therefore managed to keep her mind off how much she missed Gil.

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"Hey, Griss?" Catherine approached his office and called him out of his book "She's coming back tomorrow…you know that, right?"

He nodded feeling his stomach churn at the thought of seeing her again.

"Well, I was just wondering if you'd be up for helping us out with the welcome back party we're throwing her."

Grissom nodded again and wondered what it would be like to look into her eyes again. Would he see the love she'd held there for years or the hate and hurt he'd seen there the last night he'd been home?

His thoughts were quickly dismissed by the ringing of the phone. Holding one hand up to tell Catherine to wait a sec, he picked up.

"Grissom ... what?! ... when? ... I'll be right there!"

Catherine looked at him as he stared in shock at the receiver for a few seconds.

"What's up?" She watched him as he stood up and grabbed his coat and bag.

"It's Sara. That was the hospital; apparently I'm her emergency contact number. They wouldn't tell me what was wrong, only that I should hurry."

He made for the door and Catherine realised why Sara was at the hospital, not wanting to miss this and not wanting Grissom to drive in such a state of nerves, she ran after him and offered to drive him to Desert Palms.

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Catherine had barely stopped the car in the lot at the hospital and Grissom was already opening the door.

Once inside, they made their way to the receptionist's desk and asked where they could find Sara Sidle.

"Fourth floor, to the right, ask the nurse where her room is" replied the distracted girl in a white suit.

Without a 'thank you' or anything, Grissom sprang for the elevator and Catherine followed.

The fourth floor was the maternity. Catherine remembered as much from when she'd had Lindsey. She was only hoping that Grissom wouldn't stop to question what they were doing there. He didn't.

Once the elevator doors opened, Grissom turned right and practically ran to the desk.

"Sara Sidle's room please." He waited impatiently as the nurse behind the desk checked the files.

"Room 208, right through there" She said pointing to a corridor behind Grissom.

Catherine thanked her and then hurried to keep up with Grissom as he literally ran to the door.

"Grissom!" She shouted as he reached the door "Just…be patient…"

He looked at her quizzically and entered.

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Sara had been holding her brand new baby daughter in her arms when she heard the door knob turn and the door swung open. Standing in the door way was the last person she'd expected to see.

It was only when he began to open the door that Grissom realised he was in the maternity ward and started to wonder why. He got his answer when he saw Sara lying on a bed holding a small child wrapped in pink blankets.

"G…Gi…Grissom." She could do nothing but stare at him. No one knew she was there and she hadn't called him.

"I'm your emergency contact number." He blurted out staring bewildered at the scene in front of him.

"Oh…" Was all she could say.

"What…um…wha…" He could barely formulate words in his state of shock.

"I should have told you, Gil. I know I should."

He continued to look at her questioningly "Tell me what?"

"I was pregnant. That's what caused my strange mood that month, I was scared that you'd run from this."

It took Grissom several seconds to connect the dots.

"You mean…that's…" He couldn't help a slight smile forming on his lips.

"Your daughter? Yes." She smiled as he approached.

"So…you…"

"God, Gil. I've missed you so much."

Looking down at the small baby, Gil Grissom felt more emotions than he ever thought possible. "So...you pushed me away, because you thought I wouldn't want the baby?!" He sounded incredulous. How could he not have wanted the perfect infant that was sleeping in his love's arms?

"Well…I was scared. It was all so new…then the whole thing with…I couldn't think straight and then as time went by I could think of how to tell you."

Though he should feel angry, the happiness inside him shut out all other feelings.

"Sara, I wouldn't have run from this. I would have been shocked, but I would _never_ have run from this."

"I know that now…But at the time, there was so much going on…"

Grissom saw a single tear trickle down Sara's cheek and whipped it away quickly.

"Sara, I love you…can we try again? Have you forgiven me?"

"I forgave you the moment I read your letter. I just…"

She didn't finish her sentence since it was silenced by Grissom's lips. For the first time in seven months, they felt all the love and passion they had for each other surface again. One kiss was enough to erase the past and lay down a path for a bright and happy future.

It was then that Catherine entered.

"Hem…" She made her presence known.

"Catherine!" Sara greeted as she and Grissom pulled apart and he took his daughter in his arms for the first time.

"I see you two have worked it out…" She was smiling broadly at Grissom who was looking mesmerized at his tiny daughter.

"Yes, we have…" Was all Sara could say as she cried of happiness.

"Cath…" She looked at Grissom who had finally looked up from the baby "Get the team…"

She smiled to see him so happy and after a quick nod left to do what he asked.

Forty five minutes later, the door opened again and Nick, Warrick, Greg and Catherine walked in. All three men looking shocked.

"You were telling the truth?!" Was all Nick could say as he looked at Grissom sitting by the window with a sleeping infant in his arms.

"Yes I was, Nick. Grissom…" He looked up at her "How long has Sara been asleep?"

"Five minutes." He stood up and handed Catherine the sleeping baby "I have to run a quick errand…will you stay here please?"

"You're leaving your newborn daughter with a co-worker?!" Asked Catherine slightly confused as she held the baby.

"Only because I trust you and this is a very important errand." He smiled and rushed out the door.

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Two hours later, the team was lost in conversation with Sara, catching up for all the months apart.

"You did what?!" Asked Sara laughing at Greg.

"He did! If I hadn't been there, Gil would probably be dead." Said Catherine as they all laughed.

Then, suddenly the door opened and Grissom walked in. He'd changed clothes and was wearing something more formal than his work clothes but still comfortable. He smiled at Sara who was sitting in the rocking chair with the baby.

"What happened to 'quick errand'?" Asked Catherine as she smiled at Grissom.

He barely registered what she'd said and Catherine become aware of how nervous he looked. He walked over to Sara and without warning dropped on one knee. The room went silent.

"Gil, what…" He silenced her

"Sara Sidle, in the last four hours, you have made me the happiest man alive independently of my actions in the past. So now, it's my turn to make you happy. Sara, I love you. Will you marry me?" He looked up at her and opened a small velvet box containing a ring Catherine calculated had to have cost upwards of one thousand dollars.

"I…" Sara was close to tears again "…Yes!"

Grissom stood up and she joined him after placing the baby back in her cot. Grissom slipped the beautiful white-gold ring onto her finger and without warning, she pulled him into an ardent kiss that stopped only when the team began to clap and Greg began to 'whoop'.

They looked into each other's eyes for a few seconds ignoring everything and everyone else around them "I love you too" Sara whispered as their foreheads touched.

Then the moment was broken as the baby began to cry. Smiling, Sara bent down and picked her up.

"Well, there is still one announcement you two have to make." Said Warrick standing up next to Catherine "What's the little one's name?"

Sara and Grissom smiled at each other before turning to face the team "Well, we though of several names that meant something to us and we came up with one. But first we need to ask for permission to use it. So… Catherine, we want to thank you for all the help you've been to both of us these past months and ask you if you'd grant us the honour of naming our baby after you." Grissom finished the sentence and all heads turned to Catherine who was in tears.

"Oh…" She smiled but the tears kept falling "of course…" Whipping her face and walking over to the happy couple, she hugged each in turn and Sara handed her the child.

"Hey Catherine, I'm…Catherine." Everyone laughed.

Then the baby started crying again and Greg remarked "She complains as much as you, that's for sure." This caused everyone to laugh again as Grissom took little Catherine and sat back on the rocking chair.

A while later, watching his friends talk to Sara as she mindlessly fingered her ring, Grissom looked down at his daughter and realised that the love he and Sara shared was strong enough to withstand anything.

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_**Thank you all so much for reading.**_

_**Please let me know what you thought**_


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